Bottoms up

Ike and his buddy
"Make sure you rinse between his butt cheeks," my trainer reminded me.

Since you all have known me and for as long as I can remember, I have been a tad bit obsessed with horses (see examples A, B and C).  I think a pony has been on my Christmas wish list since I was four and Santa has surely been biding his time.  I've been able to take lessons on the weekend and get my equine fix on a weekly basis for a few years (okay more like 8 years).  However with the discovery of the barn five minutes from my office, starting this month, I have begun leasing a horse.  The lease is a trial period to see if I'm up to the time and financial commitment but quite frankly, I'm pleased as punch.

Nevermind the fact that there was five foot boa constrictor curled up by the arena last week.  Nevermind the 90 degree weather and sweating through everything I wear.  Nevermind the mosquitoes that are as big as mockingbirds and twice as mean.  I get to ride!

Pets, of any kind, I'm quickly realizing are a dream for about ten seconds and then reality smacks you in the face.  In addition to riding, I get to wash my horse's butt.  Because it gets all sorts of rank up in there.  Don't forget, I get to pay to do this!

Ahh, childhood dreams come true.


Comments

  1. Well as with every decision there are pro's and there are con's but it sounds like this is going to be a wonderful outlet for you! How exciting. (www.blairsays.com)

    ReplyDelete
  2. JEALOUS!!! I need ALL the details.

    ReplyDelete
  3. lol, too funny :) enjoy!!

    ReplyDelete
  4. I think the small amount of time you have to spend doing the gross/bad stuff is more than made up for by the good parts of pets and animals of all kinds. I'm glad you are mostly enjoying things!

    Also are you lying about the boa constrictor? I'm picturing an Anaconda {like the movie, I definitely saw the whole terrible series}.

    ReplyDelete
  5. What? 90 degree weather???? Its 33degree here ans I feel like dying! Just curious, what country are you from?

    ReplyDelete
  6. Invent the horsey bidet and back that boy up to it! I've been watching a lot of old westerns lately and not one has mentioned that grooming tip. Brush the horse down, sure. Wash his butt? Nope! Mammals and their cheeks! lol

    Congratulations again, my friend. Have fun!

    ReplyDelete
  7. Ah, good times. Luckily, he has that adorable face to more than make up for the . . . other bits.

    ReplyDelete
  8. A boa constrictor???? Those are one of those 'animals' that I wish never existed.

    I love..in addition, I get to wash my horse's butt. hah! Well, these horses sure are beautiful. That's for sure!

    ReplyDelete
  9. lol- that is one part of the experience I could do without.

    ReplyDelete
  10. Hehe...the price you have to pay to make your wish come true.:P
    But seriously, that is just too awesome, Rooth!

    ReplyDelete
  11. I'm forwarding this to my mom, who has wanted a pony since she was a kid and is getting really p.o'd in her old age that it hasn't happened yet!

    ReplyDelete
  12. hahaha yep. I have to clean the yeasty crap out of my bulldog's face wrinkles and cropped tail pretty much daily. It's not pretty, but it's worth it.

    ReplyDelete
  13. aahha omg so true! I've learned that as much as I love cats and dogs, volunteering at an animal shelter is the best way to get my fix b/c all I have to do is pet them (and not wash their butts eehe)!

    ReplyDelete
  14. Haha, I´m sorry - but that sentence "rinse between his butt cheeks" would have made me crack up BIG time, not what I´d expect to hear in any situation..! :-D

    http://tinajoathome.com/

    ReplyDelete
  15. i actually did have a pony for a short time when i was a little little one - his name was twinkletoes. but, he lived at my aunts house and i didn't have to do any bottom washing. i sometimes think of getting a dog but then i think of having to take it for walks in the rain and feed it and such and i think, maybe someday but not today.

    ReplyDelete
  16. Wow amazing! I love horses too - although I'm slightly terrified of them too. But I'd love to own my own horse someday :)

    ReplyDelete
  17. This is amazing! Yay for you finding this dream of yours to be so tangible! I think the buttwiping and boa constrictor would be a bit much for me, but goodness your Instagram horsey photos are gorgeous!!

    ReplyDelete
  18. ha! you make me laugh :)

    ReplyDelete
  19. Haha! Paying to wash a giant animal's butt - dream come true, I'm sure! In all seriousness, though, how awesome! I'm sure you're loving it!

    ReplyDelete
  20. What is a boa constrictor doing there? :) I've always admired female equestrians galloping gracefully in complete control of their horses. Haha, you're so funny as always.

    ReplyDelete
  21. Kinda cool to say you have a horse, but yea, the maintenance and cost must be high! Let us know if you stick with it!

    ReplyDelete
  22. Ahhh the glamour of horses :) super excited for you to have a barn so close, and a lease. What kind of horse have you on lease - details please, and photos!

    ReplyDelete
  23. OK...so I just re looked at your post and see that he is called Ike, and is an appaloosa...yes?

    ReplyDelete

Post a Comment

Popular Reads