On cheerleading

Etsy
One of the nicest compliments that I've been paid recently is that I have been the personal cheering squad [for a friend] and that I should add "cheerleading" to my skill set.  Which really set me on my heels and got me thinking hard, particularly about the type of friend I want to be.  I feel foolish in saying that, although I've thought circles around the qualities that I would want in a friend (and made sure to reflect those back), I've not reviewed, in a very long time, what type of qualities that I should have in my role as a friend.

I've always enjoyed friendships with people don't allow me to cut corners and hold me to a higher standard - they expect more of me, as they should.  I am the type of person who enjoys being pushed harder and further.  But it's important to recognize the importance of providing encouragement, of being in someone's corner, regardless of if he / she is winning or losing.  A cheerleader provides that unconditional support.  That person will shake pom poms in the face of enemies and shout, spell, and chant with all of his / her might to lend that extra oomph.  That person may even come up with a clever rhyme or two.  I've been so very wrapped up in myself for awhile now, and it's taken an unexpected compliment to shake me from this reverie of self indulgence and over-introspection.  I need to be the friend that others want to have, and not just the type of friend I would like to have.

 So to my friend who gave me that lovely compliment, thank you a million times back.  I shall endeavour to be the peppiest, preppiest, rootin' tootin' cheeriest cheerleader you've ever seen.


Comments

  1. Hm. I've really been trying hard to reconnect with some of my old friends by inviting them to events... but perhaps the way to do it is to support things they're already interested in.

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  2. The golden rule says to treat people the way we want to be treated. But it's even better to treat them the way they want to be treated. It's a fair amount of work, you have to really pay attention. More often than not, I fall into being a mirror, reflecting back to folks how they treat people.

    So, to all those who think I'm a jerk, guess what... lol


    PS - to have friends, you have to be a friend. Based on my observations, you're doing pretty well in that department.

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  3. I like this, thanks for the reminder.

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  4. That has to be one of the best compliments a person can give to a friend. Awesomesauce, Rooth:) I know that I don't know you IRL, but having been a blog reader of yours for awhile, I'm 100% sure this is well-deserved:)

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  5. You know, I never really thought about this! All of my closest friends (3 of my 4 bridesmaids, in fact) came from school -- we were in a 5th-12th school and those friendships we made at 11 years old have just stuck. We never reflected on the whys or hows, we just assumed (happily, rightly) that we're friends because we've always been friends. But now that you point it out, a good friend is always your cheerleader...even if she has to smack you upside the head with her pompom when you make bad choices, haha. Not surprised you're a good friend! xo

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  6. i think this is one of the greatest qualities in a friend during the tough and good times. i think all too many times i've seen friends who were there when i was miserable and never when i had something good happening in my life. when that happened they got all jealous and said things that dampened my spirits. i always say that a good friend is there to cheer you on during the good and bad times.

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  7. i do think it's a good place to start with "what kind of friend would i want?" but you're right, taking you a bit out of it to see what kind of friend your friend would want is important. i think this does usually happen organically, without thought or awareness (like you did it and you didn't even realize) because that's what makes friendships so magical. we are allowed to be ourselves, and we allow others to be themselves and no matter what we support each other. there have been times when i thought i was being an awesome friend, or vise versa only to find out i/the other person was doing what they thought was awesome and it wasn't actually awesome for them/me. but the coolest thing about friends is you can talk about this stuff so easily and then move on 5 seconds later!

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  8. My best friend is challenging and always makes me want to go out to be better. We should always strive to find people like that and without hesitation distance yourself from those who are toxic... Did I go off topic? Ha! Have a nice one!

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  9. I'm with you . . . I think I'd rather be a cheerleader than a pusher. Ha! That doesn't sound right, but you know what I mean . . . hopefully. :)

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  10. That really is a wonderful compliment! You are a fantastic friend!

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  11. When I worked at a grocery store, I had a friend who loved when she was assigned a register near me...not so we could talk when it got slow, but because I had a calming influence on her whenever a pain in the butt customer came through her line. I always liked hearing that.

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  12. what a sweet story. I find that I'm a different kind of friend depending on who I'm with. maybe it's time to review that too... xoxo

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